You just never know.

One minute everything is business as usual and the next you find yourself face to face with a most unexpected surprise. If lately your life has seemed a bit humdrum and you think nothing can shock you - come sit by me.

Have I got a story for you.

Yesterday evening after the usual routine of a summer day, my children were all busy doing what they usually do and I walked into the kitchen to put away the last of the supper dishes when I spied a black sock on the floor next to my desk. Initially, I wondered who would be wearing black socks on a 95 degree summer day, as I walked over to pick it up.

Then it moved.

Let me tell you, if you ever want to master the art of levitation, the key is to unexpectedly come across a live animal in your kitchen. As I came off the ground, I let out what can only be termed as a bloodcurdling scream and the furry thing began frantically running in circles around the kitchen floor. My children all came running to see what all the commotion was about and promptly jumped up on the kitchen chairs, now screaming louder than I was. “It’s a rat!” they screamed as I blindly searched for something to either catch it or beat it off with as mass hysteria hit an all time high. I could not, for the life of me, imagine how a rat the size of a large baked potato got into our house. We have a cat and a dog, for Pete’s sake, who were laying right there by the door!

In the midst of pandemonium, my oldest daughter yelled “It can’t be a rat - it doesn’t have a tail!” The creature stopped moving for a moment and seemed to be taking stock of it’s surroundings as we all ceased from screaming long enough to stop and stare.

In what I can only describe as stupefied curiosity, I inched my way closer to it holding a large box in front of me as my only shield in a woman against nature confrontation. I was trying to gage it’s reaction, much as one would approach a rattlesnake or, yeah, I admit it, the bubonic plague.

The closer I got, it suddenly dawned on me that this creature was vaguely familiar. In a moment of utter bewilderment, I turned to my daughters and said (okay, yelled) “Oh my gosh, its Hammie!”

What you don’t know and we had forgotten is that a year ago we had a baby hamster named Hamlet that went AWOL one day. We’d not seen him again, except for a brief moment a few days later when he suddenly appeared from under the stove long enough to run off with a dog treat that was as big as he was. Which, at the time, was the size of one of those bite size candy bars. We looked for him for a week, finally resigning ourselves to the fact that a) The cat got him or b) He had made his way to the great outdoors (although, I must admit, I was pretty sure it was a).

So now, realizing that this was not a gnarly rat, but, in fact, our long lost pet, we all calmed down a bit, and after some careful maneuvering, got him in the box and transferred him to his old cage. For the longest time we all stood there staring at this bizarre apparition, completely at a loss for what to say. First of all, he was now the biggest hamster any of us have ever seen, so he’d obviously been eating well and second, where the holy heck had he been this whole time?

The more we looked at him, the more bewildered we became. There were so many unanswered questions and frankly, none of us were sure how to feel about this sudden reappearance. It’s unsettling, to say the least. While I may not be the best housekeeper in the world, I surely would have noticed a large black furry thing at some point, or at least some kind of telltale evidence that one had been lurking around, but there hadn’t been any.

He appears to have had some kind of stroke, which makes him lean to one side, and which, according to the vet, signals he’s near the end of his lifespan, but he has survived on his own all this time and grown to epic proportions. As he lay exhausted in his cage, he was oddly calm, like he had finally made it through a long journey and I couldn’t help but wonder why he had suddenly decided to make an appearance after all this time and what he wanted from us now.

Here’s what I think:

“What a piece of work is man!” (Hamlet, Act II, Scene II).

While many stories have an unhappy ending, once in a while, someone really does beat the odds. Completely unbenownst to anyone (including our dog and cat), our little hamster had not only survived, but thrived. That fact alone still boggles my mind. My very favorite people have stories just like Hamlet’s. I hope to someday follow in their footsteps.

“That it should come to this!” (Hamlet, Act I, Scene II).

Just because we can’t see it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Truly amazing things are going on all the time. We just can’t see them. We are taught from birth that “seeing is believing.” But I’m one of those crazy people who think that “believing is seeing.” It’s called faith. We could all use a little more of that.

To be or not to be, that is the question.” (Hamlet, Act III, Scene I).

I find it interesting that he came back now. We are moving in a couple weeks and would never have guessed he was still here. To me, it just goes to show that even the most insignificant creatures need someone to see them, if only to say “I was here. I lived.”

“Though this be madness, yet there is method in it.” (Hamlet, Act II, Scene II).

Expect the unexpected. Or better yet, be the unexpected. My mother told me once about a day when she decided to go see my biological father, out of the blue. He hadn’t seen her in about 25 years, so her sudden visit must have thrown him for quite a loop. He was drunk (as usual) and I can only imagine what was going through his head when she appeared at his door. His initial response was “Are you going to hit me?” To which, she laughed and said, “No. I just wanted to tell you that you did something good in your life. . . Your daughter.” That was it. She just wanted to him to know. Now that was unexpected. And unforgettable. At least is was to me.(Thanks, Mom).

So much of life is boring and there are times when the unexpected can be a good thing. Like a compliment given from a sincere heart and show tunes sung loudly at bedtime. Like calling up an old friend just to say you were thinking of them and showing up at your child’s school unannounced to take them to a movie. Like finding money in the pocket of an old coat and wearing groucho glasses… to the grocery store. Like forgiving someone before they forgive you and getting a refund you didn’t know you had coming. Like being someone else’s biggest fan and giving more than expected without wanting anything in return. Like holding hands – with everyone. Or playing “ding dong ditch” with your kids on a cold winter night.(Not that I would ever do that. No sir, not me, officer).

As I write this, Hammie is fading fast. The vet says there’s nothing we can do for him except keep him comfortable, so we have. As I watch him and wonder what he might be thinking, one thing is abundantly clear. He may have come back to say goodbye, but what he really wanted in the end was for us to know that he had lived.

It just goes to show – you never know.

Thanks, Hammie.

Ahh, the best laid plans. . . .It all seemed so easy. Simple, really.

One minute you’re driving down the road, fast approaching your destination, when suddenly you find yourself at a stand still, caught up in some kind of road work, that throws off your schedule and sends you down a different route altogether.

It’s frustrating to say the least. Inconvenient, too. It usually happens when were in a hurry and don’t have time to waste on such nonsense. “Why today?” We fume. “Hurry up! Get out of my way!”

As our frustration grows, so does the delay. As we sit drumming our nails on the dashboard, willing traffic to get moving with every tap of our foot, the tension mounts and our impatience grows, but no matter how tense we get, traffic is not moving any faster, and we are forced to wait - just like everyone else.

After what seems like an eternity, the traffic begins to move and eventually we reach our destination, relieved to be back on track and anxious to put that pesky delay behind us. So what if we made some rude gestures to other drivers while we were stuck. Okay, we might have cut off a person or two in our rush to get going. Maybe we did get overly worked up, but it’s over now, so let’s just forget it and chalk it up to a bad day.

The thing about detours is that there’s always a reason for them. While we are sitting in traffic, cursing the powers that be for making us wait so long, work is being done – necessary work, that one day we will go right past, without even noticing. That road that had potholes will have been repaved and we will drive on the smooth surface with far less bumps and jolts. Bridges will be built to get us where we want to go and whole communities will spring up all around those new roads, all of which was in progress while we impatiently grouched our way through the delay.

The thing about detours is that they eventually lead back to where we want to go and they are almost never permanent. It might have been inconvenient, but the end result is that something better has been prepared and we now have a much easier ride. All our complaining and frustration just made our own journey that much harder and chances are, we missed the best part.

Time.

Time to relax a bit and enjoy the scenery. Time to listen to your favorite song or call a friend. Time to gather your thoughts and think about the future, or just the time to daydream without any interruptions. Sometimes it’s the time to look around you and really see what you’ve been missing, and you’ll be surprised at how many things your didn’t notice before. You may get to see a sunrise or sunset, or maybe have the opportunity to smile at a child who’s bored and waiting in the car next to yours.

If you’re like me and believe everything happens for a reason, delays and detours become an adventure, and the reason for them usually becomes clear.

This week I had to take my neighbor to get her driver’s license, which meant a trip to the DMV. Now, I don’t know about your town, but our DMV is also in the police station and the jail house for our county. The process takes several hours, during which time you must wait with about two hundred other people who are waiting to either visit someone in jail, renew their vehicle registration or get their drivers license. Needless to say, its quite the cross section of people, and I am an avid people watcher, so I didn’t mind too much.

The first time.

Due to some kind of snafu with her paperwork, the whole process required three trips to finally get her license. On the third trip on the third day, I was a little miffed at how much time I was having to spend, as once again we sat in that lovely state building, staring at a dangerous mix of gang members and teenage girls getting their learners permits. Amidst all the catcalls and nervous stares an elderly gentleman hobbled in, shaking badly and looking confused. He wandered around, peering at each sign, obviously unsure about where he was. After going in several doors and wandering out again, I decided to approach him and asked if he needed assistance. He looked like he would pass out from relief. He had a wad of papers in his hand and shook terribly as he offered them to me to decipher. After looking through them I saw where he needed to go and helped him get there as he humbly thanked me profusely and genuinely the whole time.

As I sat back down to wait, my heart went out to him, realizing this was, for him, a very difficult day. See, he was 98 years old and the papers he held were a demand from the county to surrender his driver’s license.

Now, you may see it differently, but I believe the reason I had to keep taking my neighbor back there was because I was supposed to be there for Mr. Calkins, (I don’t think he’d mind if I use his name) on a day when he needed a smiling face and a kind stranger to lend him a strong arm and a helping hand.

Life, it seems, is full of detours and delays that, at first may seem vastly inconvenient, but for those who know how to make the most of them, are golden opportunities to offer someone your hand.

Right now you may be facing some detours and delays that have you all in a dither, throwing off your schedule or causing you some fret. Whatever it is you face, know this:

It will pass. You will get to where you need to go eventually. If you’re facing a detour, just know that there’s always a reason and whether the delay is meant to smooth things out ahead or prepare you for something new altogether, for now, why not just sit back and enjoy the ride?

What could be more exciting than a voyage to the unknown? Or terrifying.

Down in the harbor sits a ship. A magnificent ship. One like no other. As you stand there and look at it, you are in awe at the sheer size of it. It’s unbelievably huge. As you try to take it all in you see people running around getting ready to board and the crew is busy making preparations for the long voyage. Everything needed for the trip is being loaded and the air is charged with anticipation. There’s so much to do and so little time left before it sails. Watching all the activity from the safety of the dock you start to panic. “What if it sinks? What if, like the Titanic, something goes terribly wrong out there and I drown…. What if this is the wrong boat?” You hastily pull out your ticket and double check, just to be sure. Yep. This is your boat, alright. It has your name on it in big bold letters. Still, you hesitate.

Then a voice speaks to you from nowhere. “You ready to go?” it says. “It’s time to board.”

There’s a decision to be made here. You can stay here on the safety of the shore, or set out to sea. It’s your call.

Slowly, on terrified legs you start walking up the gangway. About midway you stop and look back at the dock. It’s not too late. You could go back. Sure, people might laugh at you, but you’d be on solid ground. You look up at the ship again and take in the excitement and grandeur of it one more time. You’ve been looking forward to this voyage for a long time. You spent every last dime you had for the ticket, believing it was going to be the adventure of a lifetime. It seemed so right at the time. Now you just don’t know.

Again, a voice speaks to you, “I’m sorry, but you’ll have to either board or go back down now. We are getting ready to sail.” As you start to panic, you see others who are going back down and start to follow them. Suddenly, amidst the crowd, you see The Captain of the ship. There’s no mistaking him. He’s dressed all in white with a smile on his face and he greets each person on his way up the gangplank. When he gets to you he stops and puts out his hand. “Here, let me help you with your bag.” he says. “Take my arm and I’ll walk you the rest of the way.” With ease and grace he picks up your bag and begins walking you right on up to the entrance of the ship. There’s no turning back now, you think as he takes you to the woman who is taking tickets. “Our special guest has finally arrived.” he says, “We are free to shove off.” For a second you look around you for the “special guest”, wondering if it’s a famous person, when you realize everyone is looking at you. They are all smiling and clapping, like you were some kind of royalty…. “Wha..?” you stutter. “I’m no one special!” But the Captain just smiles at you, knowingly. “Don’t you know? He says. “This is your ship. We’ve all been waiting for you to get on board.”

As you stand there taking it all in, one thing comes to mind: “How could this possibly be my ship and who are all these people?”

Here’s what you need to know:

Every life is like a ship waiting at the shore. If you’ve ever seen that old t.v show “The Love Boat” you know that every person got on with a dream of some sort and somewhere during the journey they each found what they were looking for. Think of this as your very own episode of “The Life Boat.” You can’t even begin to imagine the kind of adventures that await you - if you just get on board. Every detail has been seen to and everything you could possibly need has already been loaded on that ship. Your dreams are all waiting to come true. There are scores of people who will sail with you and the course has already been mapped out. It would be a shame for you to miss it. Your “Life Boat” was built to sail out into the deepest waters where amazing things have yet to be seen and wonderful adventures have yet to be experienced. Sure, there’s danger. Sure, there will be some rough seas, but if you trust The Captain, he’ll get you there in perfect safety.

The question is: Do you trust Him?

I can only speak from personal experience, and I can tell you that the draw of shore is mighty powerful. I’ve spent my whole life paddling around on an inner tube, looking up at that boat, too afraid to get on. I’ve watched others get on their own boats and sail off, all the while feeling sorry for myself and pulling out my old tattered list of reasons as to why my ship couldn’t sail. Maybe you’ve heard of them.

I’ve made too many mistakes

I don’t have enough money

I’m just not lucky

Other people keep going ahead of me

I’m unloved

I’m unworthy

I’m not talented enough

I’m not strong enough

It’s not my fault

It’ll just sink anyway

This is just my lot in life

I might get hurt.

One day I pulled out my trusty list and realized that it was me who made all those excuses and as long as I kept holding on to them, I’d never leave shore. So, I did something I’ve never done before - I tore up the list and threw it in the water, paddling my little inner tube to shore. While everything in the world was yelling “Go back!” and “You’ll never make it!” I decided I’d had enough sand in my shorts and it was time to get on the boat.

Now, I don’t know where my ship is headed. I don’t have to know. Only The Captain can say for sure, but for the first time in my life, I’m trusting Him. My whole crew is breathing a huge sigh of relief that we’re finally underway and there’s nothing but open sea out ahead. Who know’s where we’ll end up, but one thing is for sure, my ship never would have sailed if I hadn’t got on board. Having someone else steer this ship who knows exactly where we’re going is a whole lot easier than paddling around on a little inner tube all alone, that’s for sure.

Today, maybe you’re like me and you’ve been paddling around your “Life Boat” reciting all the reasons why it’s too dangerous to get on board. You’ve weathered some tough storms right next to shore and can’t imagine what it will be like out there in the deep. You’ve been disappointed and discouraged so many times it’s hard to believe your life could ever be more than it is right now. That’s okay. You’re not alone. There are lots of people floating out there on those little inner tubes with you. They’re everywhere.

But, just for a moment today, why not dare to imagine something better. See your “Life Boat” in all it’s glory, setting sail to parts unknown. It’s already got everything on it you’ll need. See all the people waiting for you. Sure, there’ll be storms. Sure, there will be rough seas. Yes, some passengers will get on your nerves, but no matter what, you’ll have lived the adventure, instead of just reading about it and who knows - maybe somewhere out there you’ll see me.

I’ll be the one waving my shorts.

The Captain is calling your name now. It’s okay -You can trust Him. Take it from a former paddler – don’t wait any longer. It’s your turn to set sail.

All aboard!

There are two sides to every coin and two sides to every story. There are also two sides to every person.

We’ll coin a phrase and call them “Beauty and The Beast.”

You know both of them quite well. We all do. Unlike the fairytale, however, Beauty and The Beast in this instance are two parts of the same person and constantly battling for control of your life. If you’ve ever wondered why you act a certain way or been dismayed to find yourself doing or saying something you wish you hadn’t, then you are familiar with The Beast. That snide comment you just couldn’t help but make, the addiction you can’t break or that time you stole a candy bar at the grocery store when you were 5 years old– same Beast. The one night stand or the 10 year affair…same Beast. The name you call your ex and the dirty look you gave that extremely overweight person. You guessed it – The Beast.

On the flip side, Beauty is always there, too. You know it when she appears because even if it’s just for a moment, you are the best version of yourself. You go out of your way to help someone else or you keep your cool under pressure. The little things roll off you like water off a duck’s back and you spend more time laughing than you do brooding about what’s missing in your life. You smile a little easier and forgive a little sooner. You give more and spend less – of your time and money. Everything good in your life is a result of Beauty.

If your actions and reactions are governed by either Beauty or The Beast, the question today is: Who’s controling you?

Recently, to my surprise, I learned that I was not filled with as much “Beauty” as one might think. Those of you who know me are snickering now, but, frankly, I was shocked to find The Beast alive and well - in me. That’s usually the way it happens, you know. One thing leads to another and another and BAM! Hello Beast. If you’ve ever had things heat up in your life, you know what I’m talking about.

In my case, it was moving to a place I did not plan on, legal battles, delays in business deals, sleeping on the floor, broken promises, broken furniture, hysterical children, financial hardships and actual physical injury – all on a 105 degree day with no air conditioning. Let’s just say, even those who know and love me seriously considered calling an exorcist because I was a bonafide madwoman.

Because hindsight is 20/20, and thank God (truly)everything in life “comes to pass”, when the dust settled, one thing was clear: I am only a hot summer day away from the very worst version of myself, which is humbling in a way that those who have had some face time with their own Beast will relate to.

Lately, two things that have become clear to me. The Beast is getting way to much to eat and the world is starving for Beauty.

Interestingly enough, the answer boils down to one simple word:

Choice. It’s easy to choose Beauty when things are going your way, but when the bottom falls out and life does not turn out the way you planned, a battle begins between Beauty and The Beast and you alone decide who wins.

Choose Beauty. Feed Beauty.

When faced with everyday challenges, whether big or small, the sooner we come to terms with who is controlling us, the easier it becomes to make a choice. Do I go off on my co-worker or do I just let it slide? Do I flip that driver off who just cut in or do I smile and wave them over? Do I forgive and forget or fume and fester? Do I tell it like it is or do I tell it like it could be? Do I go the extra mile or do just enough to get by?

Every time we choose The Beast it becomes stronger and Beauty is diminished. Likewise, whenever we choose Beauty she becomes stronger and The Beast becomes weaker. When you look in the mirror, who do you see? Who do others see? If you don’t like the answer, it’s time for a change.

There is a song by the band Switchfoot, and the lyrics say “This is your life, are you who you want to be?” After my recent encounter with The Beast, I’ll be the first to raise my hand and say “Not even close.”

But, we’re working on it.

I’m a fanatic about positive reinforcement, so I have little post-its all over the place to remind me of what’s most important. Recently, I put up one single word – you guessed it - “Beauty.” It’s amazing how much power one little word can bring to your life. Today, maybe you could use some Beauty too.

Let’s face it, life is never going to be without it’s ups and downs and we will always have challenges to face and rivers to cross. The only thing we really control is who we are in the midst of them.

Today, choose Beauty. Feed Beauty. Be Beauty.

Tell you what - we’ll do it together – you and me. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it to see The Beast no longer having any control in our lives.

As a matter of fact, it’ll be beautiful.