There are two sides to every coin and two sides to every story. There are also two sides to every person.

We’ll coin a phrase and call them “Beauty and The Beast.”

You know both of them quite well. We all do. Unlike the fairytale, however, Beauty and The Beast in this instance are two parts of the same person and constantly battling for control of your life. If you’ve ever wondered why you act a certain way or been dismayed to find yourself doing or saying something you wish you hadn’t, then you are familiar with The Beast. That snide comment you just couldn’t help but make, the addiction you can’t break or that time you stole a candy bar at the grocery store when you were 5 years old– same Beast. The one night stand or the 10 year affair…same Beast. The name you call your ex and the dirty look you gave that extremely overweight person. You guessed it – The Beast.

On the flip side, Beauty is always there, too. You know it when she appears because even if it’s just for a moment, you are the best version of yourself. You go out of your way to help someone else or you keep your cool under pressure. The little things roll off you like water off a duck’s back and you spend more time laughing than you do brooding about what’s missing in your life. You smile a little easier and forgive a little sooner. You give more and spend less – of your time and money. Everything good in your life is a result of Beauty.

If your actions and reactions are governed by either Beauty or The Beast, the question today is: Who’s controling you?

Recently, to my surprise, I learned that I was not filled with as much “Beauty” as one might think. Those of you who know me are snickering now, but, frankly, I was shocked to find The Beast alive and well - in me. That’s usually the way it happens, you know. One thing leads to another and another and BAM! Hello Beast. If you’ve ever had things heat up in your life, you know what I’m talking about.

In my case, it was moving to a place I did not plan on, legal battles, delays in business deals, sleeping on the floor, broken promises, broken furniture, hysterical children, financial hardships and actual physical injury – all on a 105 degree day with no air conditioning. Let’s just say, even those who know and love me seriously considered calling an exorcist because I was a bonafide madwoman.

Because hindsight is 20/20, and thank God (truly)everything in life “comes to pass”, when the dust settled, one thing was clear: I am only a hot summer day away from the very worst version of myself, which is humbling in a way that those who have had some face time with their own Beast will relate to.

Lately, two things that have become clear to me. The Beast is getting way to much to eat and the world is starving for Beauty.

Interestingly enough, the answer boils down to one simple word:

Choice. It’s easy to choose Beauty when things are going your way, but when the bottom falls out and life does not turn out the way you planned, a battle begins between Beauty and The Beast and you alone decide who wins.

Choose Beauty. Feed Beauty.

When faced with everyday challenges, whether big or small, the sooner we come to terms with who is controlling us, the easier it becomes to make a choice. Do I go off on my co-worker or do I just let it slide? Do I flip that driver off who just cut in or do I smile and wave them over? Do I forgive and forget or fume and fester? Do I tell it like it is or do I tell it like it could be? Do I go the extra mile or do just enough to get by?

Every time we choose The Beast it becomes stronger and Beauty is diminished. Likewise, whenever we choose Beauty she becomes stronger and The Beast becomes weaker. When you look in the mirror, who do you see? Who do others see? If you don’t like the answer, it’s time for a change.

There is a song by the band Switchfoot, and the lyrics say “This is your life, are you who you want to be?” After my recent encounter with The Beast, I’ll be the first to raise my hand and say “Not even close.”

But, we’re working on it.

I’m a fanatic about positive reinforcement, so I have little post-its all over the place to remind me of what’s most important. Recently, I put up one single word – you guessed it - “Beauty.” It’s amazing how much power one little word can bring to your life. Today, maybe you could use some Beauty too.

Let’s face it, life is never going to be without it’s ups and downs and we will always have challenges to face and rivers to cross. The only thing we really control is who we are in the midst of them.

Today, choose Beauty. Feed Beauty. Be Beauty.

Tell you what - we’ll do it together – you and me. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it to see The Beast no longer having any control in our lives.

As a matter of fact, it’ll be beautiful.